I believe we will agree that it is easier to salvage and re do something before it breaks apart and the pieces are lost to one another. The same is true of marriage. The human brain as beautiful as it is, still has a few human misgivings. It will receive and believe information fed to is without and basis for reality.
My brain and perceptions can get me going down a rabbit trail that is totally unfounded. Before you totally destroy this marriage you are a part of, get together with your spouse and have a free for all talk. After all what can it hurt now?
Many people who have been close to leaving a marriage know that the longer you wait, the more you risk not being able to turn back time and rediscover the reasons why you got married in the first place. The more time that goes by after a split, the more room there is for another person to become involved. Your spouse may be feeling lonely and unloved and there is always someone waiting in the wings to help them recover there groove.
Marriages break down for all sorts of reasons but the main one is a lack of communication. Life can just sometimes get in the way. There may not have been an affair or other serious issue. You may just have simply drifted apart. Perhaps you thought your spouse and your relationship would always be there.
It is easy to take your significant other for granted without meaning too. We often spend more time worrying about our friends or our kids while believing that our other half is fine. By the time you factor in the time spent on our jobs and our kids, it leaves very little for our mates. This can lead to your spouse feeling you no longer love them or have time for them.
Love is like a plant. It takes care and nurturing to blossom. Without sunshine (attention), it withers and dies. However just like a plant, love can be revived if your willing too put out the effort.
Talk. Is there something in particular that they are unhappy with? Perhaps they believe you are involved with someone else. If you are not, convince them of your innocence. If you are, you need to make a decision as to which person you want to be with. You cannot have two significant others in your life and expect life to go on as before.
Remind your spouse of the good times you shared and all the reasons why you fell in love with them. Flatter her/him but be sincere, remember they know you perhaps better than you know yourself. Don’t get angry or try laying blame at there door. Never threaten, your kids or imply that you will harm yourself. You will only frighten them or else they will pity you. Neither emotion is the one you are looking for.
Admit that although you both have made mistakes, now is the time to move on and work things out. Perhaps you won’t be able to get your spouse back but at least you will have tried everything.
Don’t be too heavy or too desperate. You want them to find you attractive again and nobody likes a desperate person. Be strong and confident. Show them exactly what you want while at the same time convincing them that you are prepared to do whatever they want or at least meet them more than half way.
Go get your spouse back now and hopefully you will get to celebrate your golden years together yet. We did an just celebrated 50 years of marriage. All blissful? No! But, now looking back my marriage kept mostly together in the early years by my wife, I am glad it turned out this way.
As we journey,